"One more year."

I should've counted how many people clapped me on the shoulder today and said that to me. Mom and I went to help set up/serve cake/clean up for the ACHEV graduation today, and it was lovely. I love graduations... most festivities, really. Especially ones where I know people and can hoot and holler without shame. Being a junior, I guess it's my turn this up-coming year. That'll be nice. All those people hooting and hollering for US. And giving us money. That'll be nice, too. A lot of my friends graduated today... a few even graduated last year, though I was up in the mountains at the time, and therefore missed the occasion. And still, more of my friends graduate (alongside with me) next year.... and then of course come the ones who will graduate AFTER. I don't know that I have friends younger than these... close ones, I mean. I don't know... I may. I just didn't have enough coffee today. ha.

In any case, it's weird to think about - graduating, I mean. My parents will cry, I'm sure. In fact, I know. I am the baby, after all... I guess it can't be helped. I don't know what I'm going to do with myself afterwards - VC for another year, and then off to somewhere, I just don't know exactly where yet. I don't even know what I want to do. I suppose I'd better write - my life wouldn't make sense without writing. But writing what? I don't know. Writing novels is a pretty unsteady job, they tell me. And I don't want to have to depend on getting married. Sure, I want to get married. But I don't want that to be my life goal... I mean, look at those girls who go to college specifically to find a guy. And then they DON'T. I'd feel pretty silly if that were to happen, wouldn't you? I know what direction I want to go in for now, but after graduation, it gets a little hazy. And every time someone says "One more year, then it's your turn!", I get a little bit more freaked out.

There's a huge dance tonight that apparently everyone's going to... and I was invited (twice) but I didn't know how big of a deal it was so I decided to stay home with Kate instead. Then everyone gave me a hard time about it and I feel a little guilty. So my idea is to party it up with Kate and then I won't feel like I missed out on anything. So ha. Fun, starting soon with Chinese food. Then perhaps some movies... coffee... tribal dancing... use your imagination. :)