And if you hate these feelings, you can hold onto me until it dies.

Every once in a while, when I wear my glasses, I am reminded of how frequently I move my ears. Kind of like a dog. I'm not even kidding; when I think of something unexpected, my ears go back a bit. Normally it's almost imperceptible, but when I wear my glasses, the arms push into my ears when they move and then my ears hurt for a while. I suppose the answer to this would be to wear contacts... or else train my ears to stay still. Buuuut who really wants to make that much of an effort?

I have been sitting here at my desk for over five hours, researching and writing a paper for my History of Motion Pictures class. As much as I like the class, and as much as I like my teacher personally, I must say that the man is frustratingly vague in his assignments. He demands specific answers, but the assignments are nowhere near specific enough to allow for such. In any case, I spent five hours writing a five page paper.... and it had better get a good grade. I don't know why I take so long to write papers these days - I remember last semester I spent like 8 hours writing a ten minute speech, or something like that. That was ridiculous. Speaking of ridiculous, the day after I stopped throwing up because of vicodin, I began to develop a cough. That quickly turned into a cold, which then turned into an evil fever. So now my mouth is alright (still a little tender, but I can't quite say it hurts, which is nice), but the rest of me is sore and achy all over. Not to mention freezing cold at any point in the day. It was the saddest thing in the world... yesterday was a ridiculously hard, bad day - not to be grumpy-sounding or pessimistic or anything. It just really was a rotten day. I mean, Tuesdays are long and terrible anyway (I wake up around 6:45 and am gone at school until about 3), but it's especially terrible when you're sick. My fever spiked during my third class, and by the time I got in the car to drive home, I was having trouble standing up. All I remember from the hours ensuing was that, upon entering the house, I saw my mom at the computer and I managed to say, "Take care of me?" before I started crying. It's so pitiful it's hilarious. (Now, of course... not then.) Anyyyyyway. I'm still feeling sick, but the fever's gone, I think. So enough griping.

Let's see... well, I was able to go to the mime presentation on Saturday, which I was super glad about. In addition to a two hour performance, we also had a workshop for the youth group kids, and taught them two songs. There were way fewer kids there than we'd expected, but actually, it probably worked better that way - all of our leaders were sick, so those of us who knew in the least what to do had to really step it up. I don't know that we could have handled a group of 30. As it happened, it ended up being really fun - when energy strikes, I'm surprisingly good with kids. Hopefully B will post the pictures she was taking of us sometime. hint hint :]

On a completely different note, it just occurred to me that I haven't mentioned anything about Team Praha 2011. I haven't put in my application yet, but that's something I need to be working on over the next few days. The main news, however, is that Dad and Mom were asked to be the team leaders. I'm really excited for them - Dad loves this kind of thing, and Mom is ridiculously excited about the fact that she finally gets to get off this continent. I can't help feeling a little odd about it, though... when I was there last summer, I felt incredibly challenged and stretched by the fact that I was in a totally unfamiliar circumstance. I had nobody to depend on (okay, no physical human that I could depend on), so I had to do a lot of learning on my own. I learned a lot about people, God, and a lot about myself. What my strengths are, weaknesses, what I tend to do when I'm afraid or lonely... more importantly, how to deal appropriately with these things. I can't help feeling like if I go, and Mom and Dad are the team leaders, I'll let myself just depend on them for things. Now that I write it all out, though, this argument in itself seems odd. Not so much odd as lazy, perhaps. I know it's possible for self-discovery to occur even in familiar circumstances... it just takes a little more work, I guess. But it's doable. It certainly isn't going to stop me from wanting to go, anyway.

Shoot. Mom just came home and checked my forehead... apparently I still have a fever. Ohhhh well. I'm going to go eat dinner.